Big Brother 2012 has arrived!

Well it's day one and WHAT A BUNCH OF HOUSEMATES.

From jailbirds to trannies, pornstars to playboy bunnies, yep Big Brother 2012 appears to have all the ingredients required for another cracking series so we shall watch eagerly with excitement.

This year's show seems somewhat tackier than normal (is that possible?) and I notice Brian Dowling's presenting skills haven't improved. Perhaps they should just ditch the auto-cue that he has such trouble with and let him free-style it? He'd be so much better coz we all know he's a funny chap.

That's it, just be yourself Bri.

So what about the line-up? With 16 housemates there's a lot to take in but here are my first thoughts and predictions for this series so far:

1) Deana - The Miss India.

First one in and shock horror, the first one to have a secret task! Boring with a capitol B and if she didn't have immunity from this week's eviction I definitely think she would have been first out.

2) Arron - The player.

Model Arron said he wants a filthy girl to look at in the house. Hmm he could have a few to chose from I reckon...

3) Caroline - The posh girl.

Youngest and scruffiest hair'd housemate. Very giggly and silly but I think she could come across well with time.

4) Shievonne - The playboy bunny.

All Shievonne drinks is coffee and fizzy drinks. God help the housemates.

5) Conor - The lad. *UP FOR EVICTION* 

Conor claims to be 'one of those guys who everyone loves'. Hmm we'll see about that Conor. Can't say it was love at first sight for me but maybe with time...

6) Lauren - The tractor driving Kylie lookalike.

Student Lauren looked cute but had a very annoying laugh and was 'shocked' when someone likened her to Kylie. Come off it, you LOVE ITTTTT.

7) Luke - The tranny chef.

Born female, Luke is newly married and loves a practical joke. Hmm I hope hes not going to play the old hide the sausage one.

8) Adam - The ex-con.

American sounding (he was born in the UK but raised and served time in America) Adam says he 'wants to take a sh*t in the shower'. Lovely! Is that what people do in prison? Rather not know.

9) Sara - The Miss Scotland.

Six foot something Sara seems pretty scary. She claims to have an attraction to chavs. Er cool.

10) Scott - The posh boy.

Well we have a posh girl so why not!? Gay Scott says he would not like to live with anyone too 'laddy'. Could have some issues with all the geezers in this house then.

11) Ashleigh - The Essex girl.

I bet Essex cringed as they saw Ashleigh's first appearance. F-bombs and Amy Child-like 'hunnays' were being thrown all over Brian and the poor BB crowd. 

12) Luke S - The club promoter.

This Mark Wright wannabe was certainly giving it the 'Barry Mcguigan' (bigg'un) on his introduction tape. Let's hope he calms down a bit now he's in.

13) Lydia - The z list celeb. *UP FOR EVICTION* 

Girlfriend of Andy Scott-Lee (you know, who's the brother of Lisa Scott-Lee, who was in Steps...) and had a small dance part in the film Mama Mia.

14) Benedict - The porn star.

So Benedict was once a teacher. In real life or in one of his films...? Who knows but I reckon we will get some entertainment from this one.

15) Chris - The squeaky voiced bailiff.

Tan-tastic Chris who loves fake girls says he is coming in the house 'to win'. Well, not sure about that myself but good to be confident.

16) Victoria - The MILF (not sure she's even a mum actually, but you know what I mean...) *UP FOR EVICTION* 

Animal rights activist and former model (there's a theme here) looks like she could either be a good laugh, or a raving nutter. The latter would be more entertaining. 

So they are the housemates. Now it was Deana's task to nominate three of them immediately (and face to face) to be up for the first eviction. A difficult task for anyone I'd say. In previous series' when housemates have had similar dilemmas the other housemates have all tended to egg them on reassuringly with sympathetic nods and make statements like "Don't worry... No one will be upset with you...." Etc. Well, not this time it seems! Nominated housemates Connor, Victoria and Lydia were visibly fuming at Deana's decision to vote for them! 

Were there any tears? Bitchy back-stabbings? Arguments already? Any first night snogs? 

We'll have to tune into tonight's show to find out...